Everyone Has a Story

Think about the last presentation you sat through or the latest speech you heard. What do you remember? Odds are, you remember a story the speaker shared but maybe not all the details that were also included in the presentation.

Why? Because people love to hear stories and people connect to stories. Stories are interesting. Stories can be emotional. Stories can be humorous.  Stories are easy to remember and easy to repeat! 

Our friend and colleague, Sally Strackbein, (www.definingstories.com) says it best: “Facts bore. Stories score.”

Wherever you are called upon to present, if you can tell stories, your odds of being heard and remembered go up exponentially. 

I remember being at a client’s office just after a new CEO had been introduced at a town hall meeting.  People couldn’t wait to share how excited they were about what he was bringing to the organization. They repeated stories they’d heard from him. Some were funny and personal, while others told them about his values. One story he shared was about something he’d been part of that hadn’t been a success.

They loved hearing him honestly share that he didn’t think he was perfect and that he wasn’t going to expect perfection from them.  

 Here’s the best part — everyone has stories! Keep yours short and simple and practice before going public with your story. Odds are, you will begin to see the impact you’re having on your team or others in the organization.

Your story needs to be jargon-free and relevant to the topic — don’t be that person who tells a story that gets the group off target! Your story should have a beginning, middle, and end.  And, if you possibly can, include something in the story that your audience won’t be expecting.  If appropriate, use emotion — that’s where your story will have the greatest impact.

And speaking of stories, we told you last month that we’re working on a new book that will be released during 2020. It is a very different type of book from our usual business books. It’s based on stories we collected from business colleagues around the world. So, we’re committed to the power of telling stories, and as the months go by, we’ll be sharing more about what’s to come next year.

In the meantime, we hope you’ll incorporate some powerful stories of your own into your work!

Freedom — A Powerful Word

Freedom of speech. Freedom of religion. Freedom of the press. Freedom of peaceable assembly. Freedom to petition the government.  These are all rights guaranteed by the first amendment of the U.S. Constitution: “Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof, of abridging the …” above mentioned freedoms.

Along with freedoms and rights comes responsibility.  These freedoms exist to the extent that they don’t trample the rights of others. Freedoms have to be exercised responsibly. For example, a person can’t run into a building and yell FIRE when there is none and claim to be exercising his freedom of speech. 

A rather disgruntled employee once asked me during a sexual harassment workshop, “What about my freedom of speech?”  It’s the government that can’t make laws prohibiting the free exercise of speech, not your employer. Private employers can implement policies and curtail behavior to assure that their workplaces are respectful ones. We’ve come across some great stories that reflect this – stories we’ve included in our next book.

As you celebrate Independence Day this Thursday, reflect on our freedoms and the responsibilities that go along with them.  Cherish your freedoms and respect the freedoms of 

Celebrate Pride — Celebrate Diversity

The curtain opened to reveal the performers — all clad in tie-dyed shirts, a tribute to the summer of 1969 — the summer of love. I immediately noticed the inclusion of individuals with disabilities among the chorus members, themselves a diverse group. Diversity has no limits. They burst into song, one of my favorites — a classical tribute to diversity — Everyday People, words and music by Sylvester Stewart — Sly and the Family Stone.

The New Mexico Gay Men’s Chorus was performing its annual Pride Concert, and the theme this year, 2019, was a celebration of Stonewall and the summer of ‘69. Interspersed with the songs was a narrator telling the history of Greenwich Village as a haven for the LGBTQ community and the events leading up to the Stonewall Riots which began with a raid on the Stonewall Inn on June 27, 1969 and sparked an avalanche of anger. For the LGBTQ community, it was their Rosa Parks moment – the start Gay Power and Gay Pride.

Stonewall’s legacy is resistance against repression. Read more about Stonewall on the History Channel’s website, History.com at https://www.history.com/news/stonewall-riots-timeline

The songs in the program captured the music of that summer, but also the spirit of the dawn of the Gay Liberation movement. How many of these songs do you remember: Cherish, You’ve Made Me So Very Happy, The Impossible Dream, Time of the Season, and Aquarius — just to name a few.  They ended with a poignant rendition of He Ain’t Heavy, He’s My Brother before getting the audience on their feet for a rousing encore of Everyday People.

June is a month of celebrations. Celebrate Summer, Celebrate the Arts, Celebrate Equality, Celebrate Human Rights & Dignity. Let The Sunshine In.

#KuToo

You may have read recently about the protest in Japan. Women are protesting, no revolting, against the requirement that they wear high heels to work, claiming it’s gender discrimination. Japan’s Health, Labour and Welfare Minister, Takumi Nemoto, a man, claims, “It is socially accepted as something that falls within the realm of being occupationally necessary and appropriate.”  Well, I respectfully disagree.

When I heard a news clip on the radio about the #KuToo movement, a play on the words for shoes and agony, I thought of something I read in a career advice column earlier in the year.

The advice seeker wrote that her company requires professional office attire and for women that means high heels. She’d been diagnosed with back pain and told by her doctor to wear flats.  Her boss called her out for wearing casual shoes. She wanted to know if the boss could dictate what she wore.

Well, both columnists who responded totally missed the mark. She talked about employment-at-will, securing doctors notes and eliciting advice from the boss. He did an on-line search of women’s shoes where he found 25 types of women’s heels, and talked about a shopping trip with his wife for women’s shoes.

While Title VII of the Civil Rights Act of 1964 doesn’t specify manner of dress as a protection, there are state and local non-discrimination laws that do. And without checking with an employment attorney, I’d venture an opinion that requiring women to where a certain style of shoes, while not making the same demands on men, is likely sex discrimination under Title VII – or close to it.

The advice seeker didn’t elaborate on the nature of her back pain, but its root cause could be covered by the Americans with Disability Act.  Her employer could be flirting with yet another claim of discrimination.

Dress codes are tricky. Indeed, we struggled with how to talk about “questionable” workplace dress in our next book about the dynamics of workplace behavior.  Yes, employers should have the expectation their team members – male and female – will dress in a manner that’s professional, acceptable and appropriate for the organization’s business. In certain occupations, those that are safety related for example, requirements for certain manner of dress, including shoes, is certainly reasonable.  But mandating that high heels is the only acceptable foot ware for women, is not.

In The Manager’s Answer Book, we talk about recognizing other legal pitfalls in Section 7. We’d be delighted if you’d purchase a copy and check it out. https://tinyurl.com/y8umaqpz

Commencements and Commitments

It’s June, the month of graduations and weddings — commencements and commitments. 

Graduations.  They occur at the end of an academic phase — the end of high school or college, for example — with a commencement ceremony. A commencement is a beginning or start of something new. So, graduations are about ending one phase and starting a new one. 

We are in a commencement phase ourselves. Since 2011, we’ve been writing and publishing nonfiction business books of a prescriptive nature. Now, however, we’re on the cusp of a new chapter — writing and publishing in a new genre — narrative nonfiction. Narrative nonfiction is like a novel. It tells a story or stories.

We've been on a journey writing this narrative nonfiction book. Recognizing there are many stories to tell about the dynamics of workplace behavior, we set out to gather them from our colleagues. Since we wanted to write a compelling and enticing book, we took many storytelling liberties. The stories we heard were molded, tweaked, and often combined with others to fit the structure of the scenes we created throughout this book.

In order to preserve the privacy and identity of the individuals and organizations involved, we created a fictitious company and cast of characters as a backdrop against which we tell these tales. The characters portrayed are composites of a large number of professionals across a wide variety of industries and throughout multiple careers. 

Weddings. They represent commitments. A couple on a journey is looking forward and making commitments to each other about the future.  Our idea for this work of narrative nonfiction formed in 2011 as we concluded writing The Big Book of HR. Along the journey — gathering stories, countless drafts, rewrites, and edits — we were interrupted with requests from our publisher to write three more books. Then there were other life events that stalled us. 

Now we are rocking it. This year alone the manuscript has been in the hands of four HR colleagues for peer review and now it’s been turned over to three beta readers for their critique.  Once we get all this feedback, more rewrites will be done. Then we can move onward to get the book to market.

We know there’s still a great deal more to do — cover design, editing, formatting — but we’re on a solid path to the next stop on our journey. Publication and book launch are planned for 2020. 

Many of our readers have been along on this journey with us.  Now, we invite all of you to keep up with our progress and hold us to our commitment. We’ll be sharing more information in our weekly blog — makingpeoplematter.blogspot.com — and in this monthly newsletter, so please be on the lookout for them. 

Barbara and Cornelia

First Impressions

I recently walked into a huge office complex for the first time and stopped for a moment looking for the building directory. I heard a voice behind me say, “Do you have a problem?” I didn’t think he could be talking to me but when he repeated the words, I realized he was – he was asking me if I had a problem.

I was stunned at his choice of words.  He must have thought he was being helpful, but he made me feel I’d done something wrong.  I certainly didn’t feel welcomed.

I politely explained that this was my first time in this building and I was a bit unsure of where I was to go. What I really wanted to say was no, I didn’t have a problem, but you certainly do.

It would have made such a difference to me if he’d said something like, “Can I help you find where you’re going” or “The building directory is to your left.”

Sure, we all have bad days when we say or do something that is out of character. Maybe on another day, this man would have welcomed me and been helpful rather than treating me like I was a problem he’d have to fix. However, I may not ever go to that building again and he’ll never have a chance for a do-over.

There was an old Head and Shoulders commercial that said, “You never get a second chance to make a first impression.” How true that has turned out to be. We all need to be aware of what we say and how we say it so that the person we are interacting with, is left with a positive impression – even if the interaction is as short term as the guard in the example above. 

How about when you go for a job interview? What about your first meeting with a prospective client? Do you think about what you plan to say and how you plan to say it before your meet? If not, you may want to run your opening through your brain or practice it out loud a couple of times so the first impression you make is a positive one.

Now, don’t get me started about the habit so many people have of saying, “No problem” instead of “you’re welcome” when they are thanked!  I want to respond – “I know I wasn’t a problem” but I stop myself.  Yet, it is tempting!

What Employee’s Value from Work: Tips From The Manager’s Answer Book

The Washington Post, using an independent research organization, does an annual survey called Top Workplaces.  They publish the results in their Sunday Post magazine.

It’s not surprising to learn employees surveyed are looking for organizations where they have confidence in the firm’s direction.  Even in a time of low unemployment, this shouldn’t come as a surprise. Said in a slightly different way, employees want transparency from their leaders.

The Post’s survey also showed that employees want to work for an organization with high ethics and where the organization’s values are lived. Most well managed organizations publish their values, but some have trouble living up to or demonstrating them. This is not what today’s workers are looking for in an employer.

The result that did surprise me is that 67% of the respondents said they value working in a place were different points of view are encouraged. This is great news. People want to work where there is diversity of thought.

High on the list of things people value is having a good manager. The adage that “people don’t leave organizations—they leave managers” reinforces what the respondents said in this survey. Strong managers who set clear expectations and hold people accountable tend to be the kind of managers people want to work with.

Manager’s Tips:  If holding employees accountable is a struggle for you, The Manager’s Answer Book addresses this issue and here is a portion of the answer:

Managers should hold their people accountable for their work but before you can do that, clear expectations must be set. One of your most important roles as a manager is letting your team know what is expected of each of them. If they are new to our organization or your team, if you’re starting a new project, or if you are asking for something you’ve never asked of them before, they need you to be clear on issues such as:

• When is the task/project due?
• What are the key deliverables?
• Are there milestones for check in?
• What will success look like at the conclusion of the project
• How will my performance be measured?

See page 76 of The Manager’s Answer Book for more information on setting expectations and holding employees accountable.

As you work to improve your managerial skills, keep in mind what people value from work and if you don’t already do so, maybe you want to ask your own team what’s important to them.  You may learn valuable information that will help you engage and retain your staff.